Fear Of Failure

 

split bridge, one side followers, one side leaderImage: renjith krishnan / FreeDigitalPhotos.net

 

My personality is reflective of a clutch hitter. When the bases are loaded, full count, team down by two runs, I’m confident I can hit a home run. When I am called to lead, I am comfortable assuming a leadership role. When I am asked to follow, I am known to be a trustworthy consigliere.

I have always felt comfortable to lead or follow, knowing I was surrounded by team members. As I stand alone, yearning for ways to contribute in the workforce, I am riddled with fear. I don’t have co-workers to collaborate with, or a boss to impress. I am on this journey alone, without much direction. I am afraid to fail.

The fear of failure is going to have to substitute for team members. The fear of failure has asked me to follow and I have been a solid listener. I have listened and understood that I may not succeed. However, I believe it’s my time to lead. I will introduce fear and uncertainty to bravery and success!

Much Love,
Marissa

Why Is It So Dark In Here?

Quick blog post today. I may start posting restaurant reviews on my blog. My fiance and I are planning to have a celebratory dinner with our parents. One concern with chronic dizziness is finding a well-lit restaurant not overwhelmingly noisy.

Image: federico stevanin / FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Side note:  Is ambiance in a restaurant really that important? Why do restaurants have to be so dark? I personally enjoy seeing my company:) If  you have any suggestions in the Los Angeles/ San Fernando/Burbank/Pasadena areas please don’t hesitate to comment.

I Feel Like My Priorities… All Mixed Up!

I have been reflecting upon my latest blog entry. I listed 10 limitations and found it interesting that I also listed 10 advantages. I was unwilling to have the disadvantages out-way my advantages.  I believe this is testament to my inner spirit. That inner spirit has been manifesting into willpower. I have this incredible drive to not allow this condition to rob me of the dreams I once dreamed.

Before the condition the top priority in my life was work. I spent countless hours working. I was young and energetic and I had a solid career. Everything else in my life such as health, family, friends,  and even myself became secondary. I was able to pour all of this innate drive into work. I was excelling and believed I was destined to have a successful career.

 

 

 

Image: digitalart / FreeDigitalPhotos.net

So what happens when you are forced to create new priorities yet have the same ambitions? Since being stripped of my top priority, work, how do I learn to prioritize and focus my energies on the life areas I neglected? Maybe it’s time to place the “everything else” at the top of my agenda.

I admittedly believe that if I somehow get back into the workforce I am regaining what I once lost. However, I am failing to use this drive to focus on the things I never lost, my family and myself!