Livin’ On The Edge And Trying Not To Fall Off!

Imagine being trapped inside your house for two solid days!

Majority of your day is spent chillin in your bed because every move you make induces nausea, heavy head, disorientation, and down right overall sickness.

For the last two days, this has been my script playing out. This Thursday was vestibular rehabilitation therapy. During VRT, I did well and showed small signs of improvement! Whoop. However, the stimulus and physical activity left me feeling like a wet noodle.

I fell asleep last night at 9:00pm (those that know me know this is a miracle!) and didn’t wake up today until close to noon! YES, you read that right. I woke up once in the middle of the night to pee, and woke up every hour starting at 6am. I felt too exhausted to get out of bed. Fatigue is SO brutal. I assume it’s my body’s way to protect itself.

I should confess that yesterday I drank a 16oz Monster Energy Drink (shhh, don’t tell babe. He thinks that stuff is horrible for me!) hoping to feel some sort of energy. It didn’t even touch me.

I woke up today to find a note left for me from my future-in-laws! They had left to run a few errands.

Hand written note to me from in-laws

I knew that Babe was with his buddies watching football.

Good for them! It makes me happy that those I love are living their lives and enjoying what’s good and fun in the world.

I actually felt OK after waking up this afternoon. “Feeling OK” is what allows me to go for walks and venture to places like the grocery, shopping, etc.

I started pacing the house and began feeling stir crazy! I hopped into the shower hoping to distract myself, but that didn’t help. Put on my clothes, makeup, and grubbed on some cereal.

Have you ever felt yourself screaming on the inside? This trapped feeling started to overcome me. I just couldn’t take it anymore. Screw it! I was going to walk to Starbucks.

When a thought becomes fixated in my mind, you can trust that it’s going to happen.

I got bold and sent a text message to babe saying I was going to head to Starbucks. Whoop!

Text message to babe

I grabbed my pepper spray, phone, walking stick, and headed out the door. I noticed I was a bit more wobbly than usual on my walk, but I ignored it! Screw that. I was going to complete my mission.

As I was walking I felt that internal screaming dying down. I actually felt happy to be outside. Beyonce’s “Diva” was playing on loop in my head (Sorry Blake! I know you hate that song, but it’s my jam!)

I arrived at Starbucks and confidently ordered a skinny latte with a splash of sugar-free hazelnut!

I made it back home, sat at the dinning room table, and started sipping my luscious $3.55 drink! OUCH! I felt a pain toward the back of my foot. What the heck. I looked down at my cute shoe, removed it, and caught a glimpse at what was causing the pain.

Starbucks- Venturing out to grab a Skinny Latte

Since you know I am all about the life lesson’s let me share a few….

1.) Start embracing “feeling ok”! I am going to start appreciating “feeling ok,” because I am now VERY aware of how limited my world becomes when I feel terrible!

2.) When going for a lengthy walk choose common sense vs. cute! It’s ok to rock a cute outfit from the ankles up. Comfortable shoes are your friend!

Much love,
Marissa