Uncomfortable Questions Surface

12-12-12 project member Andi started me on…

Assignment #3:

Read through email excerpts of a woman that was recently given the news her baby will be born with Down syndrome.

My baby girl was given the T21 diagnosis in utero one week ago.

I have read through these email excerpts several times. I even printed out the email to allow myself a chance to digest the content away from the computer.

I circled 50+ negative words used by this expectant mother in reference to her pregnancy.

The expectant mother is committed to moving forward with the pregnancy, but everyone in her support circle is unsupportive.

There is distance between her and her husband. Her husband seems to be shutting down at the thought of having a child with Down syndrome. She is starting to notice the resentment building up.

The geneticist has suggested terminating the baby for the sake of the other children in the family.

The geneticist went as far as to question this expectant mothers intelligence for wanting to see the pregnancy through.

This woman’s blood pressure is up, glucose is out of control, and she is currently in the hospital trying to get everything stabilized. She is at 28 weeks and has already had to see a pediatric cardiologist because they saw two holes in the baby’s heart.

Imagine being in the hospital at 28 weeks pregnant hearing terrible news about your unborn child and no one is there to comfort you!


1.) How can we expect that this woman’s daughter will be welcomed into an environment that is loving and appreciative if EVERYONE in her circle is resentful. (including the docs!)

2.) Why do some physicians and specialist believe a baby with Down syndrome is so detrimental to a family?

3.) If having the child is dangerous on the mother physically and emotionally is termination the best solution?

If I am uncomfortable entertaining these questions, I can only imagine the depth of emotion a woman facing these uncomfortable questions goes through.

Much love,